Collected Wisdom

These are the things that I believe based on 28 years of breathing:

• Wine tastes better shared with friends
• Sports become more interesting when you watch them with a group of loud, semi belligerent fans (preferably with chests painted)
• If you're paying the bills then you don't have to make your bed
• 99% of sitcoms are not funny
• There is never a "right time" to be broken up with or to break up.  It always sucks.
• If you think of an idea of something that would be nice to do but never actually do it - you don't get credit for it (this applies maybe only to my ex boyfriend who forever would ask for "credit" for thinking to get me flowers but not getting them)
• No matter what anyone tells you, the Cubs will lose.  Horrifically.  Don't have any faith in them.  
• If you're fourth and inches ... GO FOR IT.